Healing From Grief & Loss | Dr. Mary-Frances O'Connor

Andrew Huberman June 2, 2025
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Andrew Huberman

@hubermanlab

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The Huberman Lab podcast is hosted by Andrew Huberman, Ph.D., a neuroscientist and tenured professor in the department of neurobiology of ophthalmology, and by courtesy, psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Stanford School of Medicine. The podcast discusses neuroscience and science-based tools, including how our brain and its connections with the organs of our body control our perceptions, our behaviors, and our health, as well as existing and emerging tools for measuring and changing how our nervous system works.

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My guest is ⁠Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor, PhD⁠, Professor of Clinical Psychology and Psychiatry at the University of Arizona and a world expert on the science of grief and loss. We discuss what happens in the brain and body when we grieve, the role of dopamine and yearning in the grieving process, the health risks of getting stuck at particular stages of grief and how to move through loss while also deeply honoring the person, animal or thing that is no longer with us. Dr. O’Connor explains that grief involves cycling back and forth between protest and despair (often guilt and anger too) and explains science-supported ways to move through that process in the healthiest possible way. Everyone experiences grief and loss at some point. Dr. O’Connor provides valuable knowledge and tools to help you navigate grief under any circumstance. Episode show notes: https://go.hubermanlab.com/W8yuZuR *Thank you to our sponsors* AG1: ⁠https://drinkag1.com/huberman Wealthfront**: ⁠https://wealthfront.com/huberman BetterHelp: ⁠https://betterhelp.com/huberman Helix Sleep: ⁠https://helixsleep.com/huberman Function: ⁠https://functionhealth.com/huberman **This experience may not be representative of the experience of other clients of Wealthfront, and there is no guarantee that all clients will have similar experiences. Cash Account is offered by Wealthfront Brokerage LLC, Member FINRA/SIPC. The Annual Percentage Yield (“APY”) on cash deposits as of December 27,‬ 2024, is representative, subject to change, and requires no minimum. Funds in the Cash Account are swept to partner banks where they earn the variable‭ APY. Promo terms and FDIC coverage conditions apply. Same-day withdrawal or instant payment transfers may be limited by destination institutions, daily transaction caps, and by participating entities such as Wells Fargo, the RTP® Network, and FedNow® Service. New Cash Account deposits are subject to a 2-4 day holding period before becoming available for transfer. *Follow Huberman Lab* Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hubermanlab Threads: https://www.threads.net/@hubermanlab X: https://twitter.com/hubermanlab Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hubermanlab TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hubermanlab LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrew-huberman Website: https://www.hubermanlab.com Newsletter: https://www.hubermanlab.com/newsletter *Dr. Mary-Frances O'Connor* Website: https://maryfrancesoconnor.org University of Arizona academic profile: https://psychology.arizona.edu/person/mary-frances-oconnor Grief, Loss and Social Stress (GLASS) Lab: https://maryfrancesoconnor.org/lab Neurobiology of Grief International Network: https://www.neurobiologyofgrief.org The Grieving Brain: https://amzn.to/4dEUBJ8 The Grieving Body: https://amzn.to/4kPPTuG X: https://twitter.com/doctormfo LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/maryfrancesoconnor Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doctormfoconnor Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/maryfranceso Mastodon: https://mastodon.social/@[email protected] *Timestamps* 00:00:00 Mary-Frances O’Connor 00:02:22 Grief vs Grieving; Love & Bonding, Gone Yet Everlasting 00:07:42 Sponsors: Wealthfront & BetterHelp 00:10:29 Sudden vs Slow Death, Attachment, Reframing Relationship 00:14:52 Religion, Integrating the New Relationship 00:20:46 Yearning, Dopamine, Brain, Addiction 00:27:58 Culture & Grief Literacy; Protest, Despair & Hope, New Relationships 00:40:09 Sponsors: AG1 & Helix Sleep 00:43:21 Protest, Despair & Transmutation; Changing Attachment Hierarchy 00:52:04 Bereavement Support, Medical Risk 01:05:27 Culture, Alcohol & Death; Dying of a Broken Heart, Medical Risk 01:13:40 Sponsor: Function 01:15:28 Navigating Grief, Emotions & Body, Tool: Progressive Muscle Relaxation 01:23:57 Grief Stages; Permission & Coping, Judgment & Guilt; Lessons from Grief 01:35:44 Grieving Suicide, Rumination, Tool: Shifting Environment 01:47:24 Belief Systems, Religion & Grief 01:54:17 Afterlife, Contemplating Death 01:58:35 Tools: Contemplating Death; Life Celebration, Terror Management, Empathy 02:07:46 Mental Oscillation, Dual Model of Bereavement 02:14:00 Avoidance; Remembering a Loved One, Resilience; Getting Worse & Seeking Professional Help 02:22:15 Time Perception & End of Life, Motivation & Energy 02:30:01 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow & Reviews, Sponsors, YouTube Feedback, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter Disclaimer & Disclosures: https://www.hubermanlab.com/disclaimer

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