Maddy’s Battle With Cancer

Video Description

She was beautiful, patient, selfless, loving, ferocious, and kind. She drew people in and made them feel like their lives and problems were her priority. She was animated, fiery and strong yet so gentle and considerate. She loved me and our children endlessly. Maddy adored our quirks and magnified our strengths. She was always positive and hopeful- one of the biggest questions I got through this cancer battle from so many people was “why is she trying to make me feel better? I should be the one making her feel better?” She remembered EVERYTHING! Songs, artists, movies, actors, quotes, funny stories, your problems, your talents, your hobbies, and your struggles. She would drill you relentlessly with questions about what mattered to you. She made YOU feel like you were her best friend but that’s how everyone felt about her. She had a light and a smile that could overpower any room while also not being at all attention seeking! She thrives in every environment, every day! She was so animated with her facial expressions that she always felt perfectly engaged in her conversations with you. This made talking with her extremely fun, and sometimes a little dangerous because she wore every single emotion on her face. If someone said something unkind, cruel, rude, or wrong, Maddy’s expressions showed it, and a lot of the time this was a combination of hilarious, thrilling and a little scary. There were so many times that she would get into a story about something or someone unjust, and I would grab her hand and say. “Love, people are going to think we’re fighting because you look pissed haha” and then her smile would explode. She was a foodie. We loved traveling and finding the best food! Even though she was only 100 lbs she could destroy a double cheese burger. I’ve always liked salads so lots of times I would order a salad and she would order a double cheeseburger and without fail, the server would put the wrong food in front of us. She loved people and she was such a skilled communicator and story teller but she never dominated a conversation. She was so fully engaged in any conversation that if you were on a walk, she would slowly start to walk in front of you and slow you down because she was making such good eye contact that she would forget where she was walking. This often left us at a standstill in the center of a main walkway with me intently listening to every word. She was an athlete, an artist, and an absolute boss on the violin and piano! She brought beauty everywhere she went and she was funny as hell! If someone got on her bad side, she would talk a big game about how she was going to set them straight. She would then fold like a lawnchair and show them love. When I would call her out on this, she would smirk and say,“ honey is always better than vinegar.” She could read my mind, and I could read hers. We somehow always landed on the same viewpoint after starting on two sides of it. She would say, “Chan, we are a damn force”. She was always present! Somehow she didn’t get caught up in the past, or the future hardly ever. She had an endless hope that everything would workout for good, and if it didn’t, she knew she would make the best of it. She wore the pants because I was absolutely obsessed with her! Anyone that knows me knows that every day since I met her has been the best day of my life! It isn’t fair that she’s been taken from me just days before her 27th birthday. But it also isn’t fair that I got her. She was so far out of my league, and for whatever reason, she chose to love me perfectly. Most importantly, she was an absolutely incredible mother! Every minute of every day she was thinking about what she could do to make her kids’ life better. She loved Wren and Andi endlessly and uniquely. She parented them so different because they were so different! Even though they were only three and five, she always treated them like equals to her. She made them feel heard. She spent so much time making every day special for them and I will make sure they never forget that. In the last couple days with her, I cracked and told her I didn’t know how I was going to do it without her. I asked her how I was going to find purpose with life and what I was supposed to do. She paused, and responded “Live it for them and before you know it you will be living it for you again” so here we go. Finally, thank you to all of the friends and family and neighbors who have looked after us. Your love, thoughts and prayers have been an energy that we are so grateful for.